I am a secret

But I am not a mistress.

How so? Well this lover of mine…my partner, travels somewhat far to see me. We discuss current events. Support each other through hard times by being positive influences for each other (words of encouragement). Our sex is amazing. We’ve worked with each other successfully as colleagues. We’ve been on simple yet joyful dates.

But not one photo of us together for the world to see. I have not been declared. I’ve in a vague way declared him to the world. But only out of respect for their wishes. I want to sing from a mountain of who this person is. But sometimes I want to jump from the cliff of what seems to be a situation-ship. When people on social media make certain sexual remarks about a photo, I make sure to state that I am in a relationship. Should I say a situationship? How strange…

My lover doesn’t do that. People flirt with my lover and my lover respond with “[Blah blah blah], babe.”

Often times when I bring up my concerns lover runs to their victim box and pulls out a loophole or two.

I almost feel ashamed to be in this relationship. But then I also feel so proud because of the person they are aside from a spouse. Their actions and non actions are sending mixed signals that they refuse to acknowledge. Showing acts of sweet nothings in private. But my new colleagues, my friends, my enemies, and my siblings all know who this person is.

I am a secret…


In my tree,



Photo: E. J. Bellocq


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